cross
   Watton on the Web
Home Contact Us About Us Our Church

Statistics

Safe from
Harm

A Church
Policy

The
Memory
Debate

Helping
Survivors

Inspirations

Helping Survivors

Surviving Together Logo

What every Church Leader needs to know

In giving protection

It seems obvious that the Good Samaritan offered protection to the traveller, and that an ounce of protection is better than all the cures. Below are some important steps that church leaders can take to protect the people the Holy Spirit has entrusted to them. This is not a complete list, but it is a start.

First step; a written Child Protection Policy adopted and practiced by the church as a whole.

It is vital that every church has a child protection policy which makes it very clear that the church will always report allegations to the proper authorities, that the guidelines in the policy reflect best practice and that they are operating within the church. The deterrent value of such policies should not be taken lightly. The guidelines in the policy will also raise the standard of practice within the groups that are being run and give parents the assurance that the church is acting responsibly in its care for their children.

While we are thinking about child protection issues, I must ask the questions:

  • How important is protecting children to you?
  • What organisations or missionaries do you as a church support by prayer or financially?
  • Are these organisation or missionaries covered by a child protection policy or protocol?
  • Are they willing to act responsibly and state their child protection policy or protocol in writing?
  • Do they care about children as much as you as a church?

If the answer to any of these questions is no, you must ask yourselves why you are continuing to support such missionaries or organisations. We have to realise that claiming 'we are Christians' can never satisfy those who honestly care in today's society. There are obviously many other areas of church life in which we can appraise our determination to protect people.

We would ask that every member of every church who reads these pages goes to their church leadership and asks, 'What is our policy on the protection of children'?

For more on policies click here

Second step: Approachability and Training

As church leaders we must not think that we have to face these issues alone. There are people of other denominations and in organisations who are willing to help and advise if approached. As church leaders we always say "I'm approachable, come and see me if you have a problem or need help." Well, it is good for us also to approach others for help and advice.

We must not feel that we must be experts in every area of life or that we train people but don't need training ourselves. Neither should we allow ourselves to be put in the role of Parson by people (the word 'parson' derives from 'person' in village life and came to mean the person who knew everything and did everything). Let us have the humility to approach others with a spirit of teachability.

Third step: Protecting Adult Survivors

There are so many ways in which we can protect survivors, my hope here is to cover just some of the more important ways.

  1. Words of Knowledge - A great deal of care must be given to spiritual gifts in discerning abuse. If we give the word it can be abusive to the survivor because it robs them of their ability to control, and thus cope. We may also then become embroiled in the memory debate. A wise way to handle such words is for them to be given to the church leader who then can weigh the word and give support until the person is ready to disclose.
  2. Counselling Survivors - We must be sure that those who are in pastoral care or counselling know their limitations. Helping people through these experiences can sometimes take years and qualified help should be sought for the person. Don't be fooled, a quick prayer rarely resolves these types of issues, it is more likely to enforce a period of denial. Yet prayer is imperative.
  3. Facing the Unbelievable - We must not dismiss or disbelieve what an adult survivor says they remember. Neither must we act rashly on the testimony of one witness. It is difficult enough for the person to believe their memories, without those around them bringing confusion and input. Remember, it is not possible to implant memories but it is possible to implant thoughts. We must believe what is being said to be an honest attempt to describe the memories of the person. Don't isolate the survivor through unbelief.
  4. Therapies and Therapists - We can protect survivors by supporting them in the counsellor they choose and the therapies that are used. We can go with the person and meet the counsellor. Remember we need quality care and qualified counsellors for our people and we should not settle for less.

Fourth step: Confidentiality

It is very important that the survivor feels they are in control of what happens to them. Confidentiality becomes an area that protects the survivor of abuse until they are willing to share their story. The decision to share or not, or how much to share and to whom should be under the control of the individual survivor or the family of the child.

We must never promise confidentiality but must act within the bounds of our church policies on child protection and confidentiality, while we enable the person to find help through reassurance and encouragement.

We see these 4 steps as a starting place to protect people and would suggest that other steps are added as you go on.

Return to What every Church Leader needs to know Index page

Back to helping Survivors index page


© 1999 Watton on the Web part of River Ministries (Norfolk)
Disclaimer, copyright and credit notices